The Power of Vulnerability

I came across an article about the lack of authenticity among influencers on social media, and it inspired me to share a bit of my own history and provide more in-depth information about myself. I understand how social media can sometimes make followers wonder, “Is she really this happy?” The truth is, there is always a backstory, filled with ups and downs, that shapes who we are today. I did question whether to open up, but ultimately, I realized that being vulnerable could foster a genuine connection and, in turn, offer hope to others.

The Day Everything Changed

“So..do you come here often?”

This was the question my bestie and I asked Joe the night we met at Bob’s Steakhouse in Grapevine, TX. Many years later, I never imagined in my wildest dreams that we would be celebrating our ten-year wedding anniversary this past March and have traveled to twenty-six countries together!

Footprints in the Sand…

First off, I’d like to be crystal clear about the source of my joy and happiness. It’s 1000% Jesus Christ and what He has done in my life. In my late 20s, He worked in me in a way that is literally hard to explain. I could write an entire blog on this, but to keep it short, here are the cliff notes: In my 20s, I was living on the wild side and had no interest in changing. God had an unseen plan for me and placed certain people in my life, including my parents and co-workers, to introduce me to His word. I started going to church. After attending a service, I came home to cook dinner. As I was making some stir fry, I suddenly realized for the very first time what He had done for me, and I asked for forgiveness. I bawled my eyes out, feeling an overwhelming sense of gratitude, cried myself to sleep, and woke up the next morning filled with the same JOY I have to this day. “Weeping may endure for a night, but JOY comes in the morning!” Psalm 30:5. When I’m asked where Joe and I get our smiles, joy, and energy from, that’s my answer! 🙏

My Unexpected Blessing

I grew up in Houston, TX. I was a very good athlete and played every sport possible. Eventually, I focused on volleyball and attended Texas Tech University on a full scholarship. During my sophomore year of college, I became pregnant at the age of 19 and gave birth to my daughter when I was 20. Her dad and I gave it the old Southern Baptist try but divorced after a short time. So, most of my daughter’s upbringing was spent with me as a single mom. We are VERY close, as her dad lives in a different city and did not take her during the summers. I cherish every single memory of her growing up. My parents have been a HUGE part of her life, and I appreciate all they have done for both of us over the years!

Navigating the Good and the Bad

I was a varsity volleyball coach for many years before earning my Master’s Degree in Educational Administration to pursue a career as an athletic director, which I really enjoyed. Early in my journey, I built a lovely home for my daughter and me, and that’s where my love for interior home design and decor began (but that’s a topic for another blog, lol).

After being single for nine years, I remarried for a short time, and no, that’s NOT JOE. Yes, you heard me right—I have been married three times! (You wanted authenticity, remember?) Over the years, my mom used to say the funniest thing. She would tell me, “Amy, the first one doesn’t count since you got pregnant!” My response was, “YES, Mom, let’s go with that!” Moms always have a way of making us feel better. To be honest, I used to be so embarrassed to admit that I have had three husbands. But the older I get, the more I realize that talking about your past can help other women who might be going through similar situations. And not only that, but I can use my new platform to give women hope for a better future! True love really does exist, even if it takes time.

The Dark Days

I was never one of those women who had to be with someone just for the sake of not being alone. I truly enjoyed my single life and never wanted to go through another divorce. Once again, this is a long story that could easily become a bestselling horror novel, but for now, let’s quickly summarize the situation with my second husband: I GOT DUPED, tricked, manipulated, deceived, scammed, conned, swindled—I got played!  Whatever word comes to mind for “impostor,” that’s what happened! When we first met, he checked off all the boxes: he was thoughtful, funny, outgoing, tall, and successful. But after the engagement, his true self emerged, and he was NOT who he claimed to be. He went into a deep dive of depression, lost his job, gained 50 pounds, and to be candid, was a total a-hole!  NOW LADIES….LISTEN UP!  This was not all his fault.  I KNEW after the engagement that he was not the same guy I met, but I married him anyway.  Can you say, “EL STUPIDO?”  I truly believed it was just a stage he was going through, I could “change” him, and he would simply snap out of it.  For any of you young ladies out there considering marriage….if he isn’t “the one” when he goes down on one knee and puts a ring on it, he sure won’t be the one after years of marriage. He apparently had struggled with VERY severe depression and mental illness his entire life but never disclosed this information to me.  The symptoms worsened, diving deeper into depression and becoming extremely mentally abusive, so we checked him into a mental hospital. During the check-in process was the first time I learned about his history with depression. He was asked if he had ever been in a psych ward before, and his answer was, “Yes, three times!” I was devastated, as you can imagine. After three years of this volatility, it became clear that not only my life but also the life of my daughter was in danger. I filed for divorce. The next sentence is very difficult to type as I rarely speak on the tragedy, but several years after we divorced, his demons took over and he committed suicide by shooting himself with a shot gun. 

To this day, I often pray for the family he left behind, as they were very kind-hearted people who only wanted the best for him. They loved him dearly, and I can’t imagine what it was like for them to go through that.

Finding Hope In the Shadows

Shortly after my divorce, my daughter and I were doing amazing. Work was going great, and she was thriving academically and athletically. Then that silly question popped up at the bar at the steakhouse, “So… do you come here often?” and I met Joe! As you can imagine, I was very hesitant to date anyone and was enjoying my newfound freedom. But if you were talking to Joe right now, he’d tell you, “Selling starts at no!” From the day I met him, there was a sense of sincerity and purity about him.

Am I saying he is perfect or handles every situation correctly? Absolutely not! There are many decisions in his life that he handled poorly and has made his share of mistakes, but haven’t we all? Life is so hard at times, and all you can do is your best. I would say this about Joe: he always has good intentions and does not have a malicious bone in his body. He truly sees the best in those around him and cares deeply for his family and friends. I’ve never seen a better father than Joe, and the way he has embraced my daughter as his own, without hesitation, is simply incredible. He is also the most respected man I’ve ever met and has built a career and legacy, coming from nothing in a small town in Kentucky to where he is now, through hard work, sweat, and perseverance.

The Final Chapter

When Joe and I got engaged, I retired from an amazing, fulfilling career. I had been working as a coach and women’s athletic director for almost 20 years, and it was time to focus on Joe and support him through a particularly tough few years ahead at work. And if I’m ever asked, “Do you miss it?” the answer is ABSOLUTELY NOT, NOT FOR ONE SECOND! 😂 I felt like I had made a huge impact on so many girls’ lives, and it was simply time to move on. I still keep in touch with many of my former players, and it’s so neat watching them raise their own families.

It was the beginning of the next chapter of life, and neither of us realized what was ahead. I distinctly remember Joe and me standing at the altar when he looked at me and said, “Be ready for AN ADVENTURE OF A LIFETIME!”—and boy, was he right! It’s been over ten years of watching our kids grow up into successful, wonderful human beings, a whirlwind of travels with Joe’s work, starting two new businesses, and my favorite thing in the world: home remodeling! I never imagined that the first home I built and designed as a single mom would be just a stepping stone into my new passion. It’s crazy to think that in just a decade we have built, remodeled, or decorated four homes, one apartment in Dallas, and two condos in San Francisco. And now, it’s finally time to enjoy the hard work and share all I’ve learned with others!

Carpe Diem

Are all things hunky-dory all the time in our lives? Of course not. I’ve had several health issues during our marriage, including a dangerous cancer gene, a full hysterectomy, and a mastectomy, and Joe lost his mom during the COVID years. Then there’s the everyday stress of our schedule, our kids, health issues, and work.

But Joe and I share a very similar approach to life. We believe that the burdens of the past and the stress of the present help us appreciate every moment we have here on Earth! The fact remains: life is over in the blink of an eye, so you might as well grab it by the balls and SEIZE THE DAY, as you never know when it will be your last. Call your mom, smile when you don’t feel like it, dance when nobody’s watching, turn off the TV, take a drive, read a book, go on that trip, cook a new recipe, and for goodness’ sake, ladies—DON’T WAIT TO WEAR YOUR GOOD PEARLS!

I’m looking forward to sharing my blogs with you all in the future! Expect lots of home ideas, fashion inspiration, incredible experiences, and, most importantly…LOVE!

“For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord; plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  Jeremiah 29:11

To God be the glory! – Amy 

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